Flickers
by diddlybops
Summary: "Have you ever felt like things should've ended up differently?" What happens if Tori never attended Hollywood Arts? Would fate bring them together?
1. Strawberries & Green Grass

**A/N: I don't know what I'm doing, but this isn't my idea. It's by ladyhawk1709, and if you hadn't read her story, I think you should! But really, it's a great idea and I'm gonna try to stray away from it. So check her out.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own much.**

* * *

The truck door slams behind me as I stride past my boyfriend lagging behind me on the lot. I don't know why I'm even bothering with going to the school's Showcase; I'm not performing, but Cat is. I reach behind me and loosely thread my fingers between Beck's rough ones, dragging him to the back of the school where the show is held since the Black Box Theater is way too small and the Asphalt Cafe is being redone for the time being.

I snarl a bit when Beck places a wet kiss on my cheek, telling me to save him a seat as he jogs across the green field and onto the stage to help his friend Andre set up for his performance with none other than Trina Vega, leaving me all alone until halfway through the show.

Speaking of the little annoying runt, I catch her dark brown eyes glaring at me before I throw her the same, menacing look, a scowl in place as I yank the ticket from the lady to get in. I keep my eyes on her before she turns away from her family and struts against the grass to the stage, her heels digging into the dirt. I roll my eyes and lay out the blanket, plopping myself down on the hard ground before I glance around the theater, seeing everyone file in with their lawn chairs and coolers while the stage crew do their ritual sound checks and lighting.

As I scope out my friends and the students I didn't care about, an unfamiliar smell of strawberries and freshly mowed grass waft in the air. My eyebrows furrow to the bridge of my nose as I turn my head to try and catch the scent again since the breeze kept sweeping it away from me. Where's this coming from? Why does it smell _so damn_ good? The combination should be unnerving. It is, but in a different way.

My gaze falls on a slim figure sitting in front of me with who I assume are her parents. I watch the way she leans back against her hands, crossing her ankles in front of her and the way her soft, brown curls bob with each movement of her head as she looks at the students and the school in such awe, whipping her attention side to side to take it all in. Before I can stop myself, the upper half of my body cranes forward as I inhale deeply, finding the source of the captivating aroma.

Holy, shit, this girl smells good. She has to be at least my age. Does she go here? God, I hope so.

After those words crossed my mind, I quickly snap back to my seat, horrified at what I had been doing. I quickly look around my surroundings to see if anyone caught me in the act of being a lunatic stalker before I glanced back at the girl in front of me.

Oh, god, I'm Sinjin, aren't I?

I clear my throat and shake my head. I could never be that creep.

_Oh, really?I bet you'd want to sniff her again, don't you?_

Shut up!

I'm brought back to the present from internally snapping at myself when I smell her again. I lean a bit closer, watching her run her nimble fingers through her long, soft hair, airing out that scent I need more of. Before my brain could register anything, my hand stretches out in front of me.

Is it as soft as it looks? Well, only way to find out.

Instead of seeing her light tresses flowing with the wind, startled blue-green eyes meet curious brown hues. The right shade, the thought processes before I felt the world stop in rotation.

* * *

"Excuse me, Ms. West, but what does this have to do with you trespassing?" A voice interrupts my previous storytelling. It's been two years since that treacherous beginning. It led me here; in an interrogation room, handcuffed by a creepy, loud, bad-breath Officer Gary Graham to a special doctor since they think I'm fucking insane.

But maybe I am. Maybe I am crazy. Maybe she doesn't exist at all except for my twisted mind. Maybe I dreamt her up.

A small pang strikes through my chest at the thought. It would be utterly devastating to know that she was never real at all.

"Ms. West? What does this all have to do with you breaking and entering into-"

I let out a soft sigh as I place my cold hands over the Styrofoam cup of coffee. It has everything to do with me ending up in a grey jumpsuit, soaking wet and screaming her name over and over until someone called the cops on me.

"I thought you wanted me to start at the beginning? I thought it would make more sense if you heard it all." I chew my bottom lip, my green eyes connecting with a shade of brown; it's all wrong, I know that now. I gauge his reaction, wondering if he'll conclude that I'm actually really crazy and skip the whole psychoanalyzing bit to throw me in the looney bin.

"I don't need your whole life story, you know? I'm glad you trust me enough to tell me though." He says kindly, afraid I might either blow up or shrink back into a shell like I had done when Officer Gary tried to 'interrogate' me. Though, despite Dr. Collins' words, I've seen that he's written all of it down.

"I know it sounds like I'm going too far back, but you need to hear all of it a-and this is where it all started, Sir." I stammer from the cold as I hear him let out a sigh and a nod for me to continue.

* * *

It's funny how time can seem to stand still one moment and race ahead the next, I think as I study her features. For some strange reason, everything's hazy, but so crystal clear. It's like those cliché, rom-com films; the background blurs and slows, but all you can see is the girl with those amazing cheekbones and that godforsaken smile who smells amazing and has the most beautiful eyes anyone's ever seen.

Wait. _Beautiful_? No. Just because this girl is _kinda _beautiful, smells _kinda _exceptional and has eyes that I wouldn't absolutely _hate_ spending the rest of my life staring into, didn't mean I was into girls. Did it?

Though, somehow I knew; at this moment, something changed and my world would never be the same and it's all because of this girl, right in front of me, looking at me so curiously while my hand freezes midair, close to her chest.

I don't know what this feeling is yet, but I have a sinking in the pit of my stomach that it can't be anything good.

"Lint. You had lint. On the back of your ugly dress," I manage to choke out without stammering as I retract my hand quickly, thankful that acting lessons prepared me for improv. It doesn't make sense, though, why my heart is beating erratically.

"I... Thank you, for the lint thing." The voice chimes in, surprising me at the sound of her low, scratchy voice while she gives me a grateful grin.

Why is she smiling? I just insulted her!

I watch her turn back around, my face showing a small disappointment before she sits up straight, scooting backwards to me as she swipes her long, wavy hair to one shoulder. "Would you mind getting it?" She tilts her head a little to glance at me as I swallow thickly.

"No." I clip in before she could finish her question, making me feel a bit stupid since she caught me trying to grab her. She simply shrugs and lets down her hair, making me let out a growl as I reach forward to pinch at her royal blue dress, brushing the imaginary lint off the most intriguing person I've ever met, but can't understand why. The electric bolts shock my fingertips and down my arm when I touch her back. Maybe my eyes and ears deceived me, but I could've sworn I heard her sharp intake of breath while her frame shivered. I quickly snap my hand back and wipe my hand on my blanket, counting the threads as I see her swivel her body a bit at an angle to see me.

"Thanks..." I can hear the smile in her voice as she lets out an awkward, throaty chuckle. I can tell she doesn't like much silence. "Hey, I'm T-"

"Alright, everybody, welcome to the Showcase." Beck's voice cuts in, his voice amplifying through the speakers as he speaks into the microphone, hearing a couple of girls cheer and compliment him. A grumble bubbles in the back of my throat as I grip onto the blades of my scissors, absently seeing the girl turn around to the front with an undivided attention. "How're you all doing tonight? We have a great show coming up, now here's Tr—"

"Ahem!" We hear from behind the curtains, earning a couple of laughter at the sound of Trina as Beck rolls his eyes.

"Up first is the... Most talented, beautiful, all around amazing and desirable person on the planet," Beck deadpans in a bored tone, reading off the words written sloppily on his palm with a glittery ink. "Trina Vega." She gets a few claps, but the rest are snickers and loud whispers, though my attention turns to the brunette who cheers loudly.

Does she know Trina? I would hope she wouldn't since she's cheering for the worst performer in the entire school. Though, I can see the resemblance with Trina and the girl's parents sitting beside her. Christ, what's her name? Tiffany? No, it doesn't fit. Taylor? Definitely, not. Why can't I think of anymore names that start with a 'T'?

Suddenly, my vision flickers on and off before everything goes black, realizing my eyes slammed shut involuntarily, grappling me into something I can't quite put into words. Instead of hearing Trina's screechy, off-key voice singing the slow melody, I hear something entirely different, beautiful, even.

_***Flicker* **__I sit up straight when I hear a soft voice starting the verse as Andre smiles when his fingers delicately press against the keys on the piano. Andre's been singing this song for ages since he wrote this piece and the most unfortunate thing was Trina bellowing out the lyrics down the halls in between classes. But this? I never imagined to hear the song in such a completely different tone with amazing vocals from a petite brunette. I watch her confidence grow a bit by the reaction of the crowd, silently motioning for Andre to speed up the melody the way he liked. _

_ At first, I'm jealous because my boyfriend can't take his eyes off of her as she sings, never off key or off beat as she dances in that dress, but then I'm in absolute awe. Who _is_ this girl? _

_ My eyes widen and my erratic heart hammers against my chest when she catches my eye for a split second before she swivels her hips into a dance, her hair flowing and whipping about as she rings out the last note perfectly, the crowd erupting into a loud cheer. __***Flicker***_

My eyes wretch back open, hearing a snapping by my ear as my vision blurs a bit, taking in the empty stage as the crew set up for the next act. I glare at the root of the sound, seeing my boyfriend snap his fingers like I'm a disobedient dog. "Babe? Babe? Helloooo? You there?" He says, snapping his filthy fingers again before I snatch them to stop that incessant sound. "There you are. You were out of it for a while."

I ignore him for a bit, trying to find the girl that sat in front of me, but she's by the stage, freezing momentarily as if she was stupefied before enveloping Trina into a tight hug after her performance, though her parents are pretending to praise her with their fingertips pressed against their temples.

I guess it wasn't that great of an act. I'm almost grateful I missed it, but I'm too busy wondering why I fantasized about a stranger I barely spoke two sentences to.

_***Flicker* **__I watch Andre grab the mic and face the crowd, "Who here thinks Tori Vega should attend Hollywood Arts?" He says with a hint of nervousness and excitement while Trina, her parents and our principal are crowding the girl. The entire student body erupts into cheers and howls in agreement, making the Latina blush._

Tori_. I smile to myself. _Tori_. It fits, I decide. __***Flicker***_

I take in a large breath, my eyes snapping open as the crowd dissipates from the stage; the one with _Tori _and her parents and Andre. I don't understand. It all feels too real. Am I making these things up? Is she really named Tori?

What the fuck is this, narcolepsy?

"Baaaaaabe?" Beck singsongs cutely, making me look at him with a small glare for interrupting my small monologue. When did he pack up our things? When did everyone leave? How long was I even out? "Come on, let's get to the party, yeah? Everyone's already there." He tugs on my hand, trying to get me up, but I take my time standing on my two feet since everything is disoriented and confusing.

It's then when I remember the party. Every year after a Showcase, before we all head back to a new school year, all of who's attending Hollywood Arts party at the beach. There's food, liquor, socializing. It should be fun, shouldn't it?

"Let's go." I stalk towards the car after a thought. Maybe she does go to our school. If she does, she'll be there.

We get to the beach, the party already in full swing as our peers crowd around the bonfire, roughhousing or singing about. Beck and I part separate ways; me to the keg, Beck to his boys. My eyes scan over the shore, looking for the lint-girl, but all I see is the annoying Trina trying to squeeze into full seated logs to brag about her not-so-brag-worthy performance.

My eyes roll to the back of my head in irritation as I grab a red cup full of beer, walking off to a more secluded spot, the one I usually take when HA has parties at the beach. I sit on the boulder, hindering myself in sight from other people as I look out at the high tide, feeling my eyelids droop in weight.

_***Flicker* **__A set of toes scrunch above the sand with each step, but I don't look up, guessing it's Beck or Cat. The chatter across the shore and the bass of the house music muffles in the background, but something else completely overpowers my other senses. _

_Sweet strawberries and freshly dewy, cut grass._

_ I bring the rim of the cup to my lips and tip it back, gulping the alcohol like air._

_ "Got any room for two on there?" The voice asks softly, a little raspy from her performance, guessing she isn't used to working her vocals like that. I quickly dismiss a vulgar thought before I get too caught up in it about my fingers working her to hit notes she never knew she could sound._

_ I look up, seeing that she's still wearing that flow-y, royal blue strapless dress, but she's ditched the heels to go barefoot, unlike her sister who's still struggling to get anywhere with ten inch heels. _

_ I don't say a word, just keeping my eyes locked on hers, as threatening as I can, before she makes her way over to sit down beside me, a little closer than I like, but with the hair on my arm rising and my bones humming, I think I like it too much. _

_ And that scares me._

_ "I'm Tori." She smiles softly at me, faltering a bit at my response, or lack thereof. _

_ "Good for you." I say in a bored tone, watching the waves roll onto the shore before the ocean pulls it back in. The silence is actually unbearable, like I owe her something, but I don't. "Jade." I sigh after a while, wondering if she actually heard me over the salty breeze and the laughter a little away from us._

_ I feel her nod beside me, digesting this all in as she nurses a cup of beer that goes untouched. The wind starts to pick up and I get more of her intoxicating scent, feeling it harder to focus. _

_She leans to the side, _my_ side. I know this because I can feel her warmth and the stupid goosebumps ripple along the planes of my arms-because honestly, why do we get these things? It's not like I need a biological, vestigial reflex to tell me that I'm feeling cold, scared, nostalgic, threatened, pleasure, euphoria, awe, or... Sexual tension. It'll only be good use if it actually told me which emotion I'm feeling because I truly don't know which one it is or why._

_I jump a bit when her tan thigh brushes against my pale one, nearly forgetting she was there altogether. I watch from the corner of my eye, seeing her tap her finger along the cup, as if she's contemplating or trying to muster up the courage to do something before she tilts her head to look at me. For a while, too, I note._

_ "There never was any lint... Was there?" Her labored breathing fans against my shoulder as her voice husks out, making me freeze noticeably. I lift my head up and look at her with glassy eyes, the buzz from the alcohol going straight down to the bottom of my stomach. _

_ I can't quite make out as to what the feeling is, yet. _

_ Her dark irises bore back into mine, daring me to lie and tell her otherwise. I can't take it, so I avert my eyes, but it isn't any better when my gaze drops to her soft, parted lips; so red and inviting. I don't think or notice as I lean in, cocking my head up as hers dip down, licking those lips. I copy her movements, my tongue swiping at the front of my teeth before I chew at my bottom lip. Her coffee colored irises flicker to my eyes and back to my mouth before they flutter close, our breath mingling against our cheeks and chins as we move in to close the gap._

_ "TORI! I NEED YOU!" A loud, pitchy voice, similar to a banshee-or Trina-yells out from a distance, making us spring apart. __***Flicker***_

* * *

My eyelids flip open, the beach dissolving into a grey, boring interrogation room and the breathtaking brunette shaping into a middle aged, salt and pepper haired man. His eyes are brown, kind, warm, but it's the wrong shade. Not the color I grew to love. "That's the first time it happened." I say as I draw in a shaky breath. I'm not usually like this—so easily shaken and nervous, but I've never told anyone about this before. The flickers, I call them, are emotionally draining.

Cat had come close to knowing the truth, but I never explained it to her fully.

I glance at Dr. Collins, seeing him scribble a bunch of notes against his notepad in concentration, the bead of sweat dribbling down his forehead as he remains silent.

"Do you... H-Have you ever felt like things sh-should've ended up differently?" I stammer quietly, but after what feels like an eternity, the soft scratching against the paper in front of me stops.

* * *

**Confused? Me, too. Should I continue? Sorry if anyone is ooc, but Trina will become more lovable, I promise.**


	2. Cold Coffee & Black Eyes - Part 1

**A/N: So... I'm gonna try to figure out a way how to get to where I wanna start the story, so if it's rushed, I'm sorry, but I don't want to repeat the episodes, especially the first season because I hardly watched it. But part two will be up eventually. By the way, the present is when Jade's with the psych, just to clear any confusion, but you all are so, so lovely; I loved the feedback which is why I'm updating a day later!**

**Disclaimer: Not my idea (ladyhawk1709) or characters.**

* * *

"So... It's happened more than once?" Evan Collins asks me as I run the plastic fork over the brown blob on my tray. My stomach's growling and the food isn't too terrible, but I'm cold and gross looking. I can tell by the stretched out mirror behind him. Well, it's really a window, isn't it? There's probably cops and other psychoanalysts concluding that I'm fucking insane. I glance back at him blankly, wondering where he's trying to get at. "I mean, not the feelings you evidently had for the girl," I see him give me a small smile, reassuring that he's not judging, he gets it, I guess. "The, um... These..."

"Flickers. I call them flickers." I fill in for him with a shrug; I don't know what else to call them. They're not really blackouts or naps or whatever. I just flicker in and out of state. His mild interest from the beginning is in complete curiosity now. I wonder if he believes me, but he's got his head tilted, eying me like I'm some sort of new species anyone has yet to discover. "And it's 'have'." I correct absently, my voice strained and shot. "I still love her." My mind is dulled with sleep and fog; I hardly even notice that I mentioned the word love out loud for the first time, but I've always known.

* * *

"Are you excited for your first day, honey?" My mom asks from the kitchen while I'm a foot out the door, grimacing that she's caught me. I let out a silent sigh and backtrack. I love my mom, I really do. She's completely opposite to me and my dad. I feel bad about the way I treat her, but she's just so nice and suffocating. She gets it, though, the whole teenage angst thing and she loves me anyway and I can talk to her about anything, which is why I almost came home crying to her in confusion after the night at the beach.

Nothing made sense. I started seeing things about a person I didn't know, but they stopped after that night. Maybe it was just my mind going haywire or something or maybe I tripped on acid, but those... Visions. They're not real. They're just a figment of my own imagination fucking with me. I don't understand it. Why now? Why does my mind choose now to go gradually insane? About a peppy little girl who has to be related to no one else but _Trina _fucking _Vega._

"Yeah, mom. I'll see you, okay?" I kiss her cheek and grab a muffin before I get into my car, driving off to school to buy a cup of coffee. I park at the Asphalt Cafe lot, seeing they've redone the graffitis on the asphalt. Given the bell and the full parking spots, I realize how late I am, but it doesn't matter, I have Sikowitz first hour anyway. I take a trip to my locker, adding another pair of scissors before I walk through the empty hallways, taking my time to get to class because I know Beck will be there. He's called and texted and even showed up at my place, but they all went unanswered.

It's been two weeks since the Big Showcase party. Any boyfriend would be a little worried if they haven't spoken to their girlfriend for that long.

The second my palm connects with the classroom door, my eyes slams shut. I don't realize it right away, but with the knot in my stomach and the swell of my chest, I know what it'll lead to, but it's already too late.

_***Flicker* **__My eyes narrow at the small window on the door, seeing the back of a brunette touching my boyfriend. I let out a loud growl as I kick the door open with my boot. "Why're you rubbing on my boyfriend?!" I watch Beck's eyes widen, but I don't care about him at this point—I'll definitely get him for _letting_ some grunch touch him like that, but I'm more concerned about this gank caressing my boyfriend's chest._

_ Strawberries and a hint of cinnamon—that's what I first register. I thought I smelt grass, but maybe it was just a memory triggering the scent. _

_ But no fucking way._

_ I didn't mentally prepare myself for this moment when the girl spins around, her hair splaying as she does so. I didn't think about the consequences of this _girl_ being in my school after what we _almost_ did that Friday night at the beach. I didn't think about how I would feel the next time her curious eyes would land on mine._

_ I want to react; freeze, gasp, touch her or slap the skinny bitch for touching Beck, but I'm not going to because as far as I know, or anyone else for that matter, I don't like or know her. And that's how I'll gladly keep it. __***Flicker***_

I let in a shaky, desperate breath when my eyes open. There's nothing in front of me. Not the girl, not Beck or his stupid coffee-stained shirt. Nothing. It's just the unopened door, but through the window, I can see that class has already started with everyone in their seats, listening to Sikowitz.

Maybe she's in there.

I tug on the doorknob and push through the threshold, my eyes scanning across the room for Tori, but to no avail.

"Ah! Jade! Lovely for you to announce your late arrival. Rump in chair. Now!" The balding teacher says with a shit eating grin. I roll my eyes and take my seat next to Beck, his arm automatically wrapping around me. Without thinking, my elbow connects to his side, feeling him let out an airy grunt, clutching onto his ribcage.

I don't mean to be mad at him, but he shouldn't let _my_ Tori touch him.

Wait, _my _Tori? I mean, _my_ Beck.

_Mine_.

Even if I probably made this whole scenario up in my head, nobody should be touching anybody! Not Tori, not Beck, no one.

"You okay?" He murmurs in my ear, my frame shivering involuntarily—good or bad, I don't know, these fucking goosebumps won't tell me if I'm scared or liking it. My eyes cast over to his concerning, light irises, but the only thing I could think of is wrong_, wrong, _wrong_, wrong._

Why's it wrong? I used to love the way he looked at me; like I'm the only one he sees. It was reassuring, to know that his eyes were on me and not any other skank starving for his attention. His attention was everything, and now it just doesn't spark a thing.

Like there's a wrong shade of brown, I think to myself, scoffing, more like. Brown is brown, idiot. Brown hair, brown skin, brown eyes. It's the same, dammit.

I finally break his stare and turn back to the front, feeling his chest fall in defeat.

He makes it way too easy.

_***Flicker* **__I grab her arm a little too roughly, ignoring the small spark that shoots to my palm, up my arm and deep into my chest as I drag her onto stage, her feet trip against each other, trying to keep up,"I've got a surprise that'll cheer up this family." I grin, but god, I'm so angry. I haven't been this angry since Susie Johnson was cast as Juliet and Beck, Romeo for last year's end-of-the-year play. Of course, I would've gotten the part if I hadn't gotten detention for 'defacing school property'. "I got us a dog!"_

_ The muscle of my jaw twitches when I hear her reply, "Yep! I'm the... New dog."_

_ "Sikowitz! Tell this _amateur_ that dogs don't speak!" I break character to spit out to the hippie teacher who has his concentration somewhere far more important: that damn coconut._

_ He clears his throat, pretending that he was listening the whole time, "Right! Tori. You're a dog. Act like it." A smirk stretches across my lips as she sinks on all fours. We throw a couple of more lines back and forth, but Beck, god, he's already on her side and that infuriates me._

_ And her scent. She's too goddamn close to me and I hate it. I can smell everything, the way my mouth salivates at the hint of cinnamon and strawberry, balanced by the grass which makes me think about the first time I met her, touched her, locked eyes with her. I need to do something quick because it's driving me fucking mad._

_ I stomp over and grab Eli's iced coffee, striding back on stage to pop open the lid. I tip the cup down, seeing the black, cold liquid cascade down on her stupid, soft hair and all over the clothes she probably spent ages picking out the night before._

_ The ice drops down on top of her head kinda hard; did you hear that? That's me winning._

_ I feel satisfaction, victorious when she gets up and runs out of class, but it doesn't take long for the guilt to set in, though I masked it pretty well, I think, but all that remains are strawberries, cinnamon, grass and coffee. Another salivating aroma attached to this girl. __***Flicker***_

I flicker back into consciousness, though, I don't think I was asleep, but I'm aware of where I am and what's real and not. I open my eyes and it's just Sikowitz on stage with a group of shruggers trying to manage improv.

It's like a light bulb. There's a small warning that tells me it's coming, but it's hard to control since it comes too quick. It's the only light in the room and everything else is pitched black. It'll blink on and off before it cuts off. Then I'm all alone, but it doesn't feel like it because I swear I can feel her all over; she's with me in the dark and there's nothing else but me and her. The lights cut back on and I'm back to being alone, waiting for the next darkness to take me.

I don't know what it is, though, or what it's trying to tell me because in this reality, she doesn't exist. No one knows who she is.

Except...

I sit up straight.

_Trina _fucking _Vega._

* * *

A loud bang of a door slamming shut startles me and Dr. Collins as a burly, cocky man prances into the room like he owns the place.

Officer Gary Graham.

I already hate this guy; I mean he's drenched in strong cologne, he looks at me with dark, hazel eyes like he wants me to think that he has the power and authority to send me to prison with a simple snap of his hand, and at the sight of a tan line on his ring finger, either someone thought he was as lovely as nails against a chalkboard or this asshole is having affair, but seeing the faint makeup against his collared shirt; affair.

"Listen to me, you little brat!" He points his disgusting, sausage finger to my face, his cigarette breath blowing into my face. "You're taking way too goddamn long telling him why you were up there!" I huff, feeling my bones rattle from the strain it's been through, trying to muster up a menacing, hard glare back at him, but he turns away just like I do. I look at the large mirror, seeing my wet hair drying pass my shoulders, the dark circles along my eyes and how sickly pale I look. I'm tired, exhausted and so lost. All I want to do is go home and sleep for a couple of days. "Hey! I'm still here, you know!" He shouts, bringing down his meaty, gross fist against the metallic table, making me and the single lamp above us jump.

I really gotta stop spacing out. "Keep your fucking balls on," The words slip before I can even stop them, but seeing the vein throb on his forehead is enough for me. "And I wasn't gonna do what you thought I was going to do!" Before he could spring at me, Dr. Collins grabs him by the arms, throwing me a warning and an apologetic look as he pulls the officer aside.

My eyes roll on its own before it drifts shut.

_***Flicker* **__"Do you have something you wanna say, Vega?" I ask through my clenched teeth, trying to keep the frustration and eagerness at bay as stand at the peak of the Little Dome. It's like midnight and I already have to get to Beck's since we're meant to hang out afterward. I stare at Tori expectantly as she fiddles with her keys, closing and opening her mouth like a fish above water. We're friends, but I won't admit it, though I've been spending more time with her than usual and I've actually grown to like it. A lot. The hill's overlooking the city and up here, the stars and moon gleam a little brighter, shining down on a conflicted Vega. __***Flicker***_

Fuck, it happened again, this flicker. That's why I'm currently under arrest for trespassing. I got that vision over and over for the past few days, but it wouldn't come completely, so I figured if I go to where I imagined her, I'd be closer to Tori, and our interactions would be more clear and... Real. So far, my theory worked. Until someone called the fucking cops on me.

I'm not surprised, though, that the flickers are coming now and much more frequently, but they're so heavy and tense and emotional that I don't know how to really deal with them; it's been eating at me for two years. I hate it, but I love it all the same.

"...needs a psych consult..." I catch a bit from a quiet, therapeutic voice, but they're drifting away from me, like listening through a glass cup.

"...don't care who you are..." Angry, these words are angry and graveled, but the voices on the hills are much louder.

"...kill herself..." This comes out softer, much more understanding, but fragile. It hits me harder, though.

"I wasn't going to kill myself!" I snap loudly before blackness sucks me back in.

_***Flicker* **__"Well! Do you?!" My voice echoes into the dark night as I cross my arms, watching Tori look down at her fidgety fingers mess with the key ring. It's been three years since I've known her. Three years since she's accidentally seared herself in my head. I know her; which is why I find it weird that she's so nervous. She's the brave one. She's the one that hardly holds back her words or feelings, genuinely. I mean, I can do that, but not sincerely, no, because we wouldn't be here right now, would we?_

_ "Yes..." She says softly, her knees buckling as she shifts in weight with each foot. We stay quiet, but god, the silence is just pure agony, even the fucking crickets around us are chirping like crazy to make up for the gaps between us._

_ "Well! What is it?" I growl out impatiently, arms thrown up in anger. _

_ "N-Never mind," She decides when she sees the look of irritation on my face, but that only makes me even more heated._

_ "God, I hate that! Why do people do that, huh? They want you to know they want to say something, but they're too afraid to actually say it, so then they try to bait you to ask them!" I ramble as I pace about, completely seething. God, I hate that shit._

_ "I'm sorry..." Tori says with a small, weak shrug. I can tell she wants to say something, it's eating her up._

_ "Do you want to say something, Tori?"_

_ "I can't..."  
"_Why_?"_

_ "Because I can't!" She bursts out, taking out her frustrations on me like it's _my _fault she can't form words into sentences, but I'm done, I'm not gonna let her string me along to beg her to tell me and she knows that when she sees me walking down the trail. I hear her though, I hear her stomping after me, her shoes crunching and crackling against the rough terrains. I love that about her; she doesn't let me win so easily. "I want to tell you that I l—" __***Flicker***_

"No!" I cry out, not noticing Dr. Collins is the only one in the room, taken aback by my outburst. "NO!" I yell out, running my hands through my hair, tugging on my tangled tresses, my eyes squeezing shut like it'll bring me back to the flicker. "Don't fucking do that to me, Vega, I swear to fucking God!" I cradle my knees to my chest, rocking back and forth as I cry in frustration. "Come back, come back, come fucking back, Vega." I repeat like a mantra. Do you see what she's reduced me to? A quivering, sobbing mess.

* * *

**Ah, how was that? A let down? Probably, lol. If you're confused, PM me and I'll try to make things clearer. But honestly, thank you for the reviews and alerts!**


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